Monday, December 31, 2007
<3 11:04 AM
Monday, December 24, 2007
<3 1:39 AM
Sunday, December 16, 2007
<3 7:31 PM
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
<3 1:29 AM
it's been a really fast week. and with the number of projects i have, i'm surprised the sense of urgency is only speech deep. other than that, i'm really busy doing a whole load of other stuff.
saturday was probably the most eventful day of the week. started off with zelia's juice party. turned out to be more than just a party, zena started an intervention for zelia. shows you how much she cares. even though she does it with 'not much love'. it will all be ok, i hope, i pray. what more can i do?
ok ok, on to my ground breaking discovery of tangy watermelon juice. i made watermelon juice with star anise and soda water. i ate alot of watermelon too. and i ate mango too. in fact, i think i ate more fruits than i actually juiced, much less drank. heh. but it was good fun, very good bonding time between the seiors and juniors and for the old people that were there. like anselm for example, it was a good chance for him to get well acquainted with the juniors.
after that, i was off to xen. went there for awhile only. had one bachata. my first dangerous bachata, actually collided into people. or they collided into us rather. then a techno tango performance. my points of view, under circumstances as such, will be kept to myself. headed to union ard 11 plus. danced for quite abit. had a 'throw-me-here-and-there' dance with lesley, really tiring but it was fun. later lesley apologized for being too rough then i said it was ok. he was flabbergasted, "you mean you agree i was rough?!" haha. then he continued, "it's ok. i like it rough." well, i rolled my eyes and walked off, turning back to laugh. he is one funny uncle. had a 'marathon' dance with jason. whenever the song slowed down, everyone was like, "get ready, go go go." siao!. esp speedy. she was very high. higher than usual anyway, almost everybody was. but it was a good night of dancing.
at 2am, we went to watch national treasure. pretty good movie. and it was newton after. i got home at 6.20 and woke up for church at 8.40. heh. my sis woke me up, for once, she was more determined to make it to church on time than i was.
i started church being a little disgusted. and ended church with that same feeling. i just didnt understand. you can ask me if you want to know. i just cannot stand him. illogical and super irritating. and it wasnt just the sudden change of plans and the eventual cancellation of plans. it started from the very time church started. does he have no brains? or is he just really insensitive? perhaps, both. urgh.
shopping with my sis had a terrible start. but it got better. bugis street was really crazy, so we just got her jeans and decided to leave for far east. but that never happened because my tired body gave in and we headed home. and i slept all the way till dinner. and now i'm blogging, still a little zoned out.
apart from all that, its been an emotional roller coaster in the house. between mum and dad. but alls good now. hope it stays like that for a long time. i actually ignored the situation, pretending that i didnt know what was going on. my sister was the one who stepped up and said her piece. i'm so proud of her. as for me? i've always had the perfect family, or at least that was what i told everyone and that was what i liked to believe. and when i decide that i'm going to help, the problems becme so real. and the fact that my family has major issues actually surfaces to reality. all families have their problems, and i can either be of some help or no help because there is only so much i can do anyway. i will choose to pray, and let the emotionally stronger sister do battle. who said the young were looked upon as weak?
may we bask in the spirit of christmas =)
it was pretty good. but very different.
i mean compared to the past 4 camps, it was different. and i guess, you need to have been in either one of those camps to really understand what i mean.
i had a good group though, they were difficult to handle in the beginning, but once the ice became luke warm water, it got pretty easy. and i'm really thankful for the bunch of people i spent camp with.
i also had a few reconciled relationships, and that was really nice. getting in touch, once again, with friends i lost touch with. and it was good.
i made a few new friends too. haha. dont we all at camp? but i'm getting to old, or the people at camps are getting way too young. like i told anyone who asked, i'm 16. haha. people actually believed me, until ernest had to give it away.
all in all, i had a good time, and it was time well spent, especially with my sister. my mini-me. haha.
all geared up for the next week, denise is in KL. mum and dad will be in KL too. erm. projects and projects. but it's all good. at least i dont have to worry abt running to school to tap my card. hehe.
the heart aches and pines for a love that is so forbidden, and yet remains so lushes and inviting. no wait, tempting. yes, ever so tempting. love perceived on a one-way track to all regret and dismay. but a love so sweet that makes everything okay. a love that yearns for unending perfection but has no stable beginning and possibly a very unfortunate end.
nightmares, no, dreams. sweet and nice and evergreen. such as those dreamed up in fairytale. yes, those dreams. the very very good ones. and yet nightmares, for what is a dream if it cannot come true but an unending stream of torment.
the mind is weak and the heart is closed to shattered. the conscience is clear but weary.
in love with the saint. the untouchable saint.
[end]
it's wednesday morning and so far i have had a terrible week. i wont be taking my basic theory this month after all. i will be waiting till next year. need to go back onto the money saving track first, and i have too much to do tmr.
my biggest disappointment so far is my placement results. UNSUCCESSFUL. haiz. there goes my attachment period to do anything. which is another reason why i am pushing back my driving plans. i'm just really upset abt it and all. heh. it doesnt help that i dont feel that great to begin with.
interview with SA main comm
-still not sure if exercising my right to confidentiality was the right thing to do. or was it back stabbing.
dance
-not involved in alumni night. i do nothing but stand ard. i need my drive back. although, i am not entirely sure what it was to begin with. and to be honest, no matter how much the atmosphere is less stressfull now, i miss having him ard. because when he isnt yelling or being a real bastard, he was such a joy to have ard.
jerinne coming in to teach soon. hope that works out. need to email her abt some stuff. last i checked, i'm PR. heh.
salsa
-same issues. think they are being worked out. fingers and arms and blah blah blah. same old stories. not as bad as before, but still there. where the studio is concerned, i'm miss invisible. i dont mind, i guess. but it would be nice if i actively existed. need a partner again, if not i cannot perform. ever. the same reasons i left BE, are now threatening my level of interest.
school
-project after project after project. and the point-blank letter with a huge full-stop. no left turn or right turn for appeal or nothing stated. outright "NO".
malaysia
-i left my black hoodie in the hotel back in malacca. for those who know which one, you will know why losing it can upset me so much. i'm practically in love with that hoodie. and it still pains. i'm pretty sentimental, so sue me.
really, can you blame me for being a little unhappy? and trust me, a little is an understatement.
there's a happy thought for the week though. just one, but it's better than nothing. i might be able to go to KL at the end of the month with jason and jerinne. oh joy.
there's a reason for everything and i can only trust that He is in control. For i know, what He has planned can only be of good and not of evil.